Things I am not allowed to do at Providence

[Sirenitie]

So, for you that have ever read Things I'm not allowed to do at Hogwarts, or 213 Things Skippy is not allowed to do in the army, here's something similar that we can cobble together.

You are a less-than upstanding Providence Agent/employee. Rather than fire you (because they actually need you whaddya know), they subject you to good old fashioned writing lines. SHARE THEM.

You can keep posting new ones every time you get in trouble teehee think of new ones.

Employee position: Providence Engineer
Employee name: Sirenitie
File opened: Reprimandation Record

Notes: Employee is extreme disruption to others in Research and Development. Recommended action is to give her a time out and write lines. Copies of lines are included.

I will not start "Mass Masked Naked Fridays" in the compound.
I will stop taking pictures of Rex on my phone so I can say I have "an EVO in my EVO."
I will stop asking White Knight what kind of bleach he uses.
I am not allowed to take the EVOs out of the Petting Zoo for "walkies."
I will stop making jokes about "getting a piece of holiday cake" around Dr. Holiday.
I will stop asking Rex if his arms and legs are the only things he can make bigger using nanites.
I will stop making "Yo mama's so white" jokes around White Knight.
Dr. Holiday's cooking is not acceptable cannon fodder.
I am not allowed to dare newly-graduated cadets into stealing Six's sunglasses.
I will stop referring to Noah as "that chick that hangs around with Rex."
I will stop asking Rex what his favorite childhood memory is.
When representing Providence on business occasions, I will not say I work for "Milk Man and the Oreo People."
Calling him "Dorkasaurus Rex" is only funny the first time.
Bobo is not a chef, and I am not allowed to serve Bobo biscuits for breakfast, or any occasion.
I will stop asking Dr. Holiday what's bugging her sister today.
I will stop telling that "Why is 6 afraid of 7" joke to Six. (because 7 ate 9!)
The reason White Knight is sealed off is not because he is a "Class E Cooties Carrier."
I will not undermine Providence agents' importance by asking them "Want to see an idiot magnet?" and telling them to follow me.
I will stop calling all the agents "Mr. Smith" and all the female agents "Mr. Boobies Smith."
When directing visitors looking for a specific employee, I will not just tell them "Look for the guy in the mask."


C'mooooon. XD

[Dr. Tinsley]

Employee position: Resident MD
Employee name: Dr. Tinsley
File opened: Reprimandation Record

Notes: Employee has been discovered taking specimens for her own research. Recommended action is to give her a time out and write lines. Copies of lines are included.

I will not clone any officers.
I will not attempt to collect DNA from Agent Six in order to clone him
I will not demand that the Captain strip down just go get a band-aid.
I will not 'accidently' trip Rex in the halls.
I will not compare notes with Dr. Holiday regarding the physique of certain Providence employees
I will stop requiring Noah to have a strip search in order to visit with Rex.
I will stop lacing White's Milk with hallucinagens.
I will stop gamlbing with the Monkey.
I am not allowed to 'borrow' the jump hets
I will not allow myself to be 'tricked' into playing in the petting zoo.
I will stop referring to the White Knight in explicatives.
The medical lab, is not my private lab.
I will stop firing all the nurses and assistants given to me.
I will no longer use above mentioned assistants for 'spare parts'
I will stop asking Agent Six if he suffers from heterochromia.
I am to stop egging Rex into hitting on Holiday.
I am to stop referring to Rex and Noah as jail bait.
I am no longer allowed in the cell block due to disrupting the prisoners.
I will not incite the inmate Gatlock to riot.
Joking that Noah and Rex are a couple is not funny.
Pretending to get food poisoning from the cafeteria, was not a good idea.
I will stop referring to Van Kleiss as hot.
I will stop referring to Captain Callan as my future baby daddy
I will not call Agent Six- an agro-nanny-ninja in disquise.
I will stop refusing to vaccinate the new recruits.

[Sirenitie]

Jan 26, 2011 12:37:00 GMT -5 Dr. Tinsley said:

I will not demand that the Captain strip down just go get a band-aid.
I will not 'accidently' trip Rex in the halls.
I will stop requiring Noah to have a strip search in order to visit with Rex.
I will not allow myself to be 'tricked' into playing in the petting zoo.
I will not incite the inmate Gatlock to riot.
Pretending to get food poisoning from the cafeteria, was not a good idea.

XD <3

Just because Six is dressed in green, does not mean he is "after me lucky charms."
Dr. Holiday's name is not Dr. Feelgood, Dr. Sexy, or Dr. McLovin.
I will not use the PA system for personal karaoke time, especially to sing "Hollaback Girl."
I will not encourage Rex to use the other agents as target practice.
White Knight is not merely a puppet of an international conglomerate, or of a giant space squid.
When receiving orders from superiors, I am not to acknowledge it by saying "Sure thing, Candy-A**."
"Crotch-grabbin'" is not an acceptable way to greet co-workers.

[Dr. Tinsley]

Jan 26, 2011 14:17:38 GMT -5 Sirenitie said:

Crotch-grabbin'" is not an acceptable way to greet co-workers.

Darn.

I will not molest my co-workers or any guests on the premises- even if they ask me to.
I will not put the Gummy Bear song on an endless loop on the Keeps communications frequency.
I will not DOUBLE DARE Rex or Bobo to do anything.

[datdude]

Employee position: Nanotech Custodial Engineer
Employee name: DatDude
File opened: Reprimandation Record

I will stop asking Agent Six if he is Batman.

I will stop using the lab equipment on cafeteria food, even on mystery meat firdays.

I will not refer to Noah as "Rex's On call young male companion"

I will discontinue my research into nanites a weight lose tool.

I will only use the X-ray goggle for official use.

I will stop all research into EVO hemp products.

[Dr. Tinsley]

I will not play ping-pong with the cybernetic eyes.
Counting the plasma vials, over and over again, does not consititute research.
I will not help Agent Six switch out blood samples.

[datdude]

I will not except any kind of re question from from BoBo

I will take the mandatory 2 week class on how not to be coned by the monkey

I will not say " my nanites are tingling " when Doctor Holiday passes by.

[Dr. Tinsley]

I will not tell White to "*explicative* off''

[Sirenitie]

Jan 27, 2011 16:41:07 GMT -5 Dr. Tinsley said:

Counting the plasma vials, over and over again, does not consititute research.

XDD It doesn't?

I am not to refer to White Knight as "Head Wanker".
"Wet T-Shirt Wednesdays" is not an appropriate method to boost employee morale, despite what anyone else says.
I do not have the authority to make "manties" mandatory undergarments.
I do not have the authority to modify Providence Dresscode to make pants optional.
If I feel my breasts are "off", I am to go see medical personnel about it, not invite other agents to inspect them.
I do not have the authority to fire Rex.
When asked to present my latest research and work, The Committee is interested in hearing about the work I've done for Providence, not how many grapes I can fit into my mouth.
I am not to use Providence resources to build a spanking machine.

[datdude]

I will not refer to Sirenitie as the one who should be in charge.

[Dr. Tinsley]

I will not join Sirenitie in Wet T'Shirt Wednesday

[datdude]

I will not induce further amnesia in rex for any reason including and especially my fellow employees paying me to do so.

[Sirenitie]

I will not run for "Super President of Providence." xDxDD


"Topless Tuesdays" is not an acceptable way to boost employee morale either, even if 96% of all Providence employees signed my petition for it.
"Purple Peon Peony Queen" is not my job title.
I will not make Rex and Noah "yaoi" for Playboys, hentai, or any form of porn.
I will not stage a coup using lab mice, EVOs, or any other animal in my access.
When trying to get into resticted areas, I must show ID, not wave my hand and say "These are not the droids you are looking for."
I will not refer to White Knight as "Bubble Boy."

[datdude]

I will not attempt to active my own nanites to get doctor holidays attention.

I will not play poker with the monkey

I will not attempt to fry any eggs from the petting zoo

[Dr. Tinsley]

I will resist the urge to 'squee' or other wise scream with excitement when I am stationed on the keep.

I will not pour sugar in the jump jets tanks.

I will not dare Sirenitie to flash Agent Six, Callan, or Rex.....or anyone else for that matter.

'Just helping the monkey' is not a good excuse.